One year ago today, June 11, 2011, my dear sister, Joan, passed away at Ebeid Hospice on the grounds of Flower Hospital.
Over this past year I have paid her bills, filed her 2011 taxes and cleared up all the loose ends that come
when someone dies. We had a memorial gathering at a friend's house in July and in April of this year, attended a memorial service for 154 people who donated their bodies to UTMC, Joan being one of those people. The service was very moving because I became aware of how thankful and grateful the college of anatomy and the young students are to have a body to help them learn. As one speaker said, "No textbook, no computer program, no teacher can do what a physical body can do to help the students."
In a gift bag, given to the survivors, was a card that stated, "Beyond the flesh you are woven into the fabric of our future. Beyond words, your spirit is threaded through our lives".
Here in my apartment I see reminders of Joan in every room. I brought many of Joan's things home when we had her estate sale. Make some toast and there's Joan's toaster. Read a book and it was hers. Look at the pictures on the wall and there are two portraits of her houses and some of her favorite artwork. Joan's grey cabinet sits in my bathroom. Joan's lovely linen pillow cases are under my head as I climb into bed. She is all around me.
If Joan's belongings were not here, I would think of her every day anyway because she was so much a part of my life, especially during her last year. I miss her!
Last night I watched a movie about an old man in a hospice facility. The movie dealt with life and death. I got teary a couple of times but also felt good because of the way they handled both living and dying.
Today I finished a book that, in part, talked of the mourning stages after the death of a mother. It, too,
brought tears to my eyes but also helped me in dealing with the death of a close family member.
Joan is physically gone but her spirit will be with me all the rest of my life.
JOAN ACKLAND, MY SISTER, MY FRIEND 1931-2011